What genius came up with the idea that days should have but four-and-twenty hours? And furthermore, was it the same fellow who thought that I should be overcome with the need to sleep for almost a third of those hours? What a twit that guy was.
I lament my lack of time not because I have so much to do and so little time to do it, but rather because I have so little time in which I get to do nothing important whatsoever. My fart-around time, if you will. I have this thing on my computer (or rather, Mandy's computer, because it works on hers but not mine - but the thing itself is mine) called GarageBand. You Mac users out there have probably heard of this. You use it to make songs. I have an electric guitar. With GarageBand I can plug my guitar into the computer and record it. And then I can use the computer to make drums, or a piano, or whatever the hell I want. I can write and record songs that I make up. I have, in fact, recorded a couple already. I think they sound sort of Pixies-ish, but that may be because I'd been listening to the Pixies a lot when I made them.
The songs are terrible. I know that. And I didn't make them for other people to hear anyway. It's not something I take seriously. I just find it relaxing. And it gives me a small thrill when I'm using the Shuffle Songs option on my iPod and one of them pops up. I just think it's kinda cool.
The problem is that recording a song, even a simple one with just a couple of chords and changes, takes a long-ass time. I mean like weeks. At least, it takes ME weeks. I find that I need to record the same riff a couple dozen times before I get a take that doesn't sound like I accidentally bumped my guitar with a garden tool. And then I need to create a drum track, which is meticulous work, and usually I create a bass track as well, which is almost as meticulous. If I owned a bass guitar as well it would make things a little easier, but I don't, and I don't take it seriously enough to actually save up several hundred dollars to buy one. Hell, the electric guitar I've got now is borrowed.
This is such a lame thing to write about. I don't know why I'm even bothering, except that I haven't posted anything up here in a few weeks. I wish I had something more interesting to comment on. Sorry.
Anyway, my point is, if days were longer, or if I didn't feel the need to sleep as much, I'd have more spare time. Would I do anything of value with this spare time? Hell, no! I'd spend it plugged into GarageBand. Not very productive, I know. But I think I would be a much more relaxed person, and therefore more capable of handling the various tasks and challenges that make up the rest of my day.
Or, maybe I'd just starting posting blogs that whine about how twenty-six-hour days aren't long enough, why can't they be twenty-eight? Or thirty? I find that my fart-around time grows more and more precious to me as I get older.
If only I could teleport to and from work. That would free up at least an hour and a half per day right there.
Wednesday, January 25, 2006
Friday, January 06, 2006
Call Me 'Rev'
So, Happy New Year, everybody. I hope you all had an exciting evening of drunken debauchery. (I know some of you had a little more drunken debauchery than others. Hah? Hah? Am I right? Am I right? Hah?)
I debauched nothing, and I was only a little drunk. I was too busy being puffed up by my own self-importance whilst officiating my friends Dan and Vicky's wedding. It went off without a hitch. Or rather, one hitch, that being Dan and Vicky. Getting hitched. Get it? Oh, never mind.
Really, though, the ceremony was awesome, an only partly because I rule. It took place at Live Bait Theatre, which is a small, intimate theater space. The bride and groom had three attendants each, and all six of them gave small readings that they each wrote themselves. There was an equal amount of laughing and crying. The best man, Dan's brother Robb, brought the house down with a poem about Legos. You had to be there. I was proud of my own work -- I managed to work in references to seventh-century Druidic pagans, Shakespeare, and Vanilla Ice. Again, you had to be there, or at least know Dan and Vicky to understand how appropriate this was.
The reception was a good time, also. The happy couple picked every song that was played, so we were not forced to suffer through the Macarena, or anything that might be defined as "Country Western," or "Adult Contemporary." The food was awesome, and yet was perhaps my only complaint as well, because it took an immense amount of willpower to get off my fat ass and dance after eating. I really felt like I should just unbutton my pants and find a couch and a TV with a football game on it.
But dance I did. Mandy and I cut a rug like nobody's business. I was quite thoroughly sweaty and disgusting by the time the party ended. We had a lovely champagne toast at midnight, which was immediately followed by Me First & the Gimme Gimmes' rendition of "Auld Lang Syne," which, if you are at all familiar with that band, pretty much sums up the night.
The trek home was something of an adventure. The reception took place way the hell out by Midway Airport, which is basically the opposite end of the city from where Mandy and I live. We'd asked the staff at the reception hall to call a cab for us, but being New Year's Eve, available cabs were thin on the ground. In the end, one of the staff ended up driving Mandy and myself, along with another couple, over to Midway, where we snagged a cab out of the arrivals line. We spent the ride back discussing the Bears' playoff prospects, which means that a good time was had by all.
I debauched nothing, and I was only a little drunk. I was too busy being puffed up by my own self-importance whilst officiating my friends Dan and Vicky's wedding. It went off without a hitch. Or rather, one hitch, that being Dan and Vicky. Getting hitched. Get it? Oh, never mind.
Really, though, the ceremony was awesome, an only partly because I rule. It took place at Live Bait Theatre, which is a small, intimate theater space. The bride and groom had three attendants each, and all six of them gave small readings that they each wrote themselves. There was an equal amount of laughing and crying. The best man, Dan's brother Robb, brought the house down with a poem about Legos. You had to be there. I was proud of my own work -- I managed to work in references to seventh-century Druidic pagans, Shakespeare, and Vanilla Ice. Again, you had to be there, or at least know Dan and Vicky to understand how appropriate this was.
The reception was a good time, also. The happy couple picked every song that was played, so we were not forced to suffer through the Macarena, or anything that might be defined as "Country Western," or "Adult Contemporary." The food was awesome, and yet was perhaps my only complaint as well, because it took an immense amount of willpower to get off my fat ass and dance after eating. I really felt like I should just unbutton my pants and find a couch and a TV with a football game on it.
But dance I did. Mandy and I cut a rug like nobody's business. I was quite thoroughly sweaty and disgusting by the time the party ended. We had a lovely champagne toast at midnight, which was immediately followed by Me First & the Gimme Gimmes' rendition of "Auld Lang Syne," which, if you are at all familiar with that band, pretty much sums up the night.
The trek home was something of an adventure. The reception took place way the hell out by Midway Airport, which is basically the opposite end of the city from where Mandy and I live. We'd asked the staff at the reception hall to call a cab for us, but being New Year's Eve, available cabs were thin on the ground. In the end, one of the staff ended up driving Mandy and myself, along with another couple, over to Midway, where we snagged a cab out of the arrivals line. We spent the ride back discussing the Bears' playoff prospects, which means that a good time was had by all.
Tuesday, December 20, 2005
Happy End-of-the-Gregorian-Calendar-Year Festivities!
Hi. Been a while. Sorry.
Let me just get this out of the way real quick: Rex Grossman can hold onto my seventy dollars for a little while longer. At least until his next boo-boo makes him sit out another 80 percent of a season.
In the few weeks since my adventure in X-Treme Hardcore Novel Writing, not a whole lot has happened. If it had, I might have more to write about today. I am ashamed to say I have not really even begun my Christmas shopping this year. Mandy? She's all done. Figures. And of course the weather this week has gone all Arctic, which will make the actual shopping oh so much fun.
There is one bit of interesting news: Mandy and I have joined in on a new business venture. We (and a handful of close friends) are starting a theater company. Now, we attempted this about six or seven years ago, with HILARIOUS results. Really. Friendships were destroyed. But last night we had our first meeting for the School of Night, wherein we outlined a business plan for 2006, and we accomplished more in those three hours than we did in six months' worth of pointless meetings for the old Accidental Theatre Ensemble. I am still amazed at just how little we understood about what we were trying to do back then. This time, however, it's very different. Everyone involved is a little older, a little more mature, and we all have some genuine experience to bring to the table. Mandy is providing her graphic design expertise, and I am applying my writing and research skills to grant-writing and development.
In the more immediate future, my good friends Dan and Vicky get married in less than two weeks, and I am hard at work composing sound words of wisdom and encouragement in my role as officiant. For those of you who are curious to know how an average schmoe like myself can be given the awesome power of joining two people in holy matrimony, more information can be found through these guys here.
Anyway, if I get something exciting to mention in the next week and a half I'll post it here. If not, merry whatever and Happy New Year!
Let me just get this out of the way real quick: Rex Grossman can hold onto my seventy dollars for a little while longer. At least until his next boo-boo makes him sit out another 80 percent of a season.
In the few weeks since my adventure in X-Treme Hardcore Novel Writing, not a whole lot has happened. If it had, I might have more to write about today. I am ashamed to say I have not really even begun my Christmas shopping this year. Mandy? She's all done. Figures. And of course the weather this week has gone all Arctic, which will make the actual shopping oh so much fun.
There is one bit of interesting news: Mandy and I have joined in on a new business venture. We (and a handful of close friends) are starting a theater company. Now, we attempted this about six or seven years ago, with HILARIOUS results. Really. Friendships were destroyed. But last night we had our first meeting for the School of Night, wherein we outlined a business plan for 2006, and we accomplished more in those three hours than we did in six months' worth of pointless meetings for the old Accidental Theatre Ensemble. I am still amazed at just how little we understood about what we were trying to do back then. This time, however, it's very different. Everyone involved is a little older, a little more mature, and we all have some genuine experience to bring to the table. Mandy is providing her graphic design expertise, and I am applying my writing and research skills to grant-writing and development.
In the more immediate future, my good friends Dan and Vicky get married in less than two weeks, and I am hard at work composing sound words of wisdom and encouragement in my role as officiant. For those of you who are curious to know how an average schmoe like myself can be given the awesome power of joining two people in holy matrimony, more information can be found through these guys here.
Anyway, if I get something exciting to mention in the next week and a half I'll post it here. If not, merry whatever and Happy New Year!
Tuesday, November 29, 2005
Bragging Rights (Part 2)
In my delirium and exuberance, I forgot to thank a couple of people without whose help I would not have reached my goal.
First, my writing buddy Dan made Mondays and Thursdays fun, and kept me motivated. Thanks, dude!
And second, my lovely wife Mandy was kind enough to leave me alone when I needed to plug in and get some typing done. Thanks, sweetie!
I feel like I just got an Oscar. Yeehah!
First, my writing buddy Dan made Mondays and Thursdays fun, and kept me motivated. Thanks, dude!
And second, my lovely wife Mandy was kind enough to leave me alone when I needed to plug in and get some typing done. Thanks, sweetie!
I feel like I just got an Oscar. Yeehah!
Bragging Rights
The Bears have won seven in a row, and their defense is being compared to the 1985 "Monsters of the Midway" defense that helped win the Super Bowl. I think such comparisons are a bit premature, but it's still a lot of fun to hear. I just hope our offense can keep up.
HOWEVER--
I am not writing about the Bears today. Today is a day to celebrate ...
... ME.
Why, you ask? Because (drumroll, please) I have successfully completed my 50,000 word novel for National Novel Writing Month! You will note that the icon I placed in the left-hand column has been changed from "Participant" to "Winner."
Whoopie!!!!!
The next step is to print the whole damn thing out, stick it in a drawer and let it mellow for a month or two. Then I will take it out and read it. If I am completely embarrassed by what I find, it will go back in the drawer, never to see the light of day again. But, if I manage to remotely entertain myself, then I will break out the fine tools and begin the process of editing and rewriting.
But that is in the future. Today, we dance!
HOWEVER--
I am not writing about the Bears today. Today is a day to celebrate ...
... ME.
Why, you ask? Because (drumroll, please) I have successfully completed my 50,000 word novel for National Novel Writing Month! You will note that the icon I placed in the left-hand column has been changed from "Participant" to "Winner."
Whoopie!!!!!
The next step is to print the whole damn thing out, stick it in a drawer and let it mellow for a month or two. Then I will take it out and read it. If I am completely embarrassed by what I find, it will go back in the drawer, never to see the light of day again. But, if I manage to remotely entertain myself, then I will break out the fine tools and begin the process of editing and rewriting.
But that is in the future. Today, we dance!
Monday, November 07, 2005
Just Checking In
Hey, everybody! Just wanted you all to know I haven't forgotten about you. I am at work right now, but as you can see it is the calm between storms, so here I am.
My participation in National Novel Writing Month is on track. I passed 10,000 words yesterday, which is pretty exciting. Week Two--the most difficult week of the month, according to NaNoWriMo founder Chris Baty--officially begins on Tuesday. So far I'm having fun, and feeling pretty good about the work.
My awesome Halloween costume turned out to be a bust, as a result of me buying shitty makeup. Serves me right for being cheap. I was gonna be the Joker. I even had this cool idea of using rigid collodion (a special thing used for making fake scars) so I could make the Joker's smile look good and hideous. But alas, I ended up looking like a convention-attending dorkwad with cheap white and red makeup smeared all over my head. The green hair worked out pretty good, though. Anyway, maybe I'll be better-prepared next year, assuming I'm still on this retarded Batman kick.
In other news, the Chicago White Sox won the World Series. I don't know if you heard. That makes us better. Hah. I, unfortunately, am more of a Cubs fan than a Sox fan, but if you live on the North Side of Chicago it gets complicated. (On the South Side things are much simpler: You support the Sox and anyone who beats the Cubs. Days when the Sox win and the Cubs lose are called South Side Double-Headers.) We on the North Side are a little more liberal with our baseball support. We want the Cubs to win, and we also want the Sox to win, just not when they are playing the Cubs. If the unthinkable were to happen and the Cubs were to meet the Sox in the World Series, the North Side would call it a win-win situation. The South Side would call it Armageddon.
It was easy to root for the Sox this year anyway, because the Cubs roster has been filled with douchebags for the last few years.
But most important is that the Bears have won FOUR GAMES STRAIGHT! And they are in FIRST PLACE!!!! Granted, they are in first place in the NFC North, which almost doesn't count. But if the Lions, Vikings and Packers all keep sucking as bad as they are, we're a shoo-in for the playoffs. Yee-hah!
Eh, I gotta git back to work now. Storm's a-comin'.
My participation in National Novel Writing Month is on track. I passed 10,000 words yesterday, which is pretty exciting. Week Two--the most difficult week of the month, according to NaNoWriMo founder Chris Baty--officially begins on Tuesday. So far I'm having fun, and feeling pretty good about the work.
My awesome Halloween costume turned out to be a bust, as a result of me buying shitty makeup. Serves me right for being cheap. I was gonna be the Joker. I even had this cool idea of using rigid collodion (a special thing used for making fake scars) so I could make the Joker's smile look good and hideous. But alas, I ended up looking like a convention-attending dorkwad with cheap white and red makeup smeared all over my head. The green hair worked out pretty good, though. Anyway, maybe I'll be better-prepared next year, assuming I'm still on this retarded Batman kick.
In other news, the Chicago White Sox won the World Series. I don't know if you heard. That makes us better. Hah. I, unfortunately, am more of a Cubs fan than a Sox fan, but if you live on the North Side of Chicago it gets complicated. (On the South Side things are much simpler: You support the Sox and anyone who beats the Cubs. Days when the Sox win and the Cubs lose are called South Side Double-Headers.) We on the North Side are a little more liberal with our baseball support. We want the Cubs to win, and we also want the Sox to win, just not when they are playing the Cubs. If the unthinkable were to happen and the Cubs were to meet the Sox in the World Series, the North Side would call it a win-win situation. The South Side would call it Armageddon.
It was easy to root for the Sox this year anyway, because the Cubs roster has been filled with douchebags for the last few years.
But most important is that the Bears have won FOUR GAMES STRAIGHT! And they are in FIRST PLACE!!!! Granted, they are in first place in the NFC North, which almost doesn't count. But if the Lions, Vikings and Packers all keep sucking as bad as they are, we're a shoo-in for the playoffs. Yee-hah!
Eh, I gotta git back to work now. Storm's a-comin'.
Friday, October 28, 2005
No, Seriously, What is Going On?
The Chicago Tribune's review of Hamlet came out today. You can read it here. It just proves two things:
FIRST: I have no idea what's good and what isn't. Maybe I need to go finish college, or something.
SECOND: I might be a theatrical lucky charm. This is the third of the last four shows I've been in to be a critical success. Unfortunately for my ego I rarely get mentioned in the reviews, but perhaps my awesomeness is a more subtle and pervasive kind--the kind that seeps into the cracks and settles into the foundation. Kind of like mold spores, but, you know, cooler.
Also, I think I have my costume all planned out for Halloween. It's not that cool, but maybe (if I can figure out how) I'll post a picture or two.
FIRST: I have no idea what's good and what isn't. Maybe I need to go finish college, or something.
SECOND: I might be a theatrical lucky charm. This is the third of the last four shows I've been in to be a critical success. Unfortunately for my ego I rarely get mentioned in the reviews, but perhaps my awesomeness is a more subtle and pervasive kind--the kind that seeps into the cracks and settles into the foundation. Kind of like mold spores, but, you know, cooler.
Also, I think I have my costume all planned out for Halloween. It's not that cool, but maybe (if I can figure out how) I'll post a picture or two.
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