I Wasn't Gonna Vote For the Guy Anyway...

... because Ron Paul wants to get rid of, among other things, the IRS and the Department of Education. Now, I'm certainly for coming up with a more efficient way of paying my taxes, but I still expect all of us to pay our share. And the Department of Education? What the hell? I will never comprehend how it is possible that anyone in this country thinks education is a bad idea — unless, of course, they have a reason for wanting the populace to be uneducated. But surely our modern statesmen are above such sinister agendas?

Then again, old Ronnie P. has issues. I saw this guy for the first time a few months ago on The Colbert Report, and he kinda creeped me out. He looks like a cross between Ian McKellin and that guy who ran the Heaven's Gate cult. And now I read this crazy shit. Salman Rushdie deserves the same treatment as Holocaust denier Ernst Zundel? One should carry an unregistered firearm to defend one's self against "urban youth"? Homosexuals "enjoy the attention and pity that comes with being sick"?

Ron Paul is a sad, hateful man.

[Thanks to Pharyngula for leading me to this article.]

The Road by Cormac McCarthy

If ever you are in the mood to take a literary punch to the solar plexus, you might give Cormac McCarthy's Pulitzer Prize-winning The Road a try. I mean that in the best possible way. I just finished it in a thirty-six hour reading marathon, and I can't get it out of my head.

The Road re-defines the term "post-apocalyptic." It makes the opening chapters of A Canticle for Leibowitz look like a romp through Narnia. McCarthy creates probably the most brutal setting I have ever read. Nearly all life has been burned away. The few survivors scavenge through the ever-present ash, searching for canned food and clothing left over from the time before. At no point does McCarthy explain what happened to the world, but the cause is not the point of the story. The story follows two characters who are never out of earshot of each other, and never wavers from their point of view. We see the world through their eyes as they travel the titular road in the hopes of finding the ocean. We learn how they survive, and through their experience we catch horrifying glimpses of just how far humanity has fallen.

The setting firmly roots the story in speculative fiction, but McCarthy's language and sense of realism bridges the gap between fantasy and mainstream literature — something I find encouraging as a fan of fantasy and sci-fi, and who feels that genre fiction is not accorded enough respect among literary critics. I hope the Pulitzer, as well as the book's induction into the Oprah Winfrey Book Club, will open more doors for genre writers.

I saw the film adaptation of McCarthy's No Country for Old Men a few weeks ago. I have not read the book, but the same quiet intensity that runs through the film is equally present in The Road. The setting itself takes the place of No Country's Anton Chigurh as the monster pursuing the main characters. The scorched earth of The Road is far more menacing, however. Chigurh's victims at least occasionally had a chance to shoot back.

One Nation, Under Dog

A couple of weeks ago a family member forwarded a mass e-mail which listed a so-called Common Sense Bill of Non-Rights. I provide a link to the list out of a sense of fair play, but I only recommend reading it if you are looking for something to put you in a punching mood. Mostly it is just a conservative diatribe against government handouts. Some of the points stated — such as the idea that we do not have a right to wealth, just the right to pursue it — I am willing to concede. Article V takes a swipe at universal health care. I thought my relative was making a bold statement here, considering said relative is married to a doctor.

But I really took offense at Article XI, which reads as follows:

ARTICLE XI: You do not have the right to change our country's history or heritage. This country was founded on the belief in one true God. And yet, you are given the freedom to believe in any religion, any faith, or no faith at all; with no fear of persecution. The phrase IN GOD WE TRUST is part of our heritage and history, and if you are uncomfortable with it, TOUGH!!!!

When I read this I confess I got angry, and had to fight the urge to launch an e-mail diatribe against my relative for sending such ignorant piss. But I have a pretty massive Irish Catholic extended family, and something told me not to rock the boat. I ended up deleting the offending e-mail.

Now I'm having one of those frustrating moments when you realize too late what you should have said, if only you'd been quick enough to think about it at the time. What I should done is responded politely, stating that I have to disagree with certain points in the previous e-mail, specifically the notion that "This country was founded on the belief in one true God." If that were true, then our Founding Fathers would probably not have made statements like these:

Question with boldness even the existence of a god. — Thomas Jefferson

I almost shudder at the thought of alluding to the most fatal example of the abuses of grief which the history of mankind has preserved — the Cross. Consider what calamities that engine of grief has produced! — John Adams

[T]hese governments . . . thus founded on the natural authority of the people alone, without a pretence of miracle or mystery, and which are destined to spread over the northern part of that whole quarter of the globe, are a great point gained in favor of the rights of mankind. — John Adams

During almost fifteen centuries has the legal establishment of Christianity been on trial. What have been its fruits? More or less in all places, pride and indolence in the Clergy, ignorance and servility in the laity; in both, superstition, bigotry and persecution. — James Madison

What influence, in fact, have ecclesiastical establishments had on society? In some instances they have been seen to erect a spiritual tyranny on the ruins of the civil authority; on many instances they have been seen upholding the thrones of political tyranny; in no instance have they been the guardians of the liberties of the people. Rulers who wish to subvert the public liberty may have found an established clergy convenient auxiliaries. A just government, instituted to secure and perpetuate it, needs them not. — James Madison

Lighthouses are more helpful than churches. — Benjamin Franklin

Of all the systems of religion that ever were invented, there is no more derogatory to the Almighty, more unedifiying to man, more repugnant to reason, and more contradictory to itself than this thing called Christianity. — Thomas Paine

And of course, my favorite:

[T]he government of the United States of America is not in any sense founded on the Christian religion; — The Treaty of Tripoli, signed by John Adams.

I really hope that e-mail gets sent around again.

Stache-Tastic

I have a mustache. It is truly awful.

I had to grow it for this show I'm working on. It's not the first time I've had to alter my facial hair for a show. I've grown big bushy beards and sharp, sinister goatees. I even shaved my whole head once. But this is the first time I've looked in a mirror and did not recognize the person staring back at me. I am uncomfortable in my own skin. I keeping thinking people are staring at me when I'm not looking. It's physically disorienting. Yesterday I left the house without my keys and didn't know it until I got to work and found an e-mail from my wife telling me to meet her on my way home so I can pick them up. I must not have even thought about locking the door behind me when I left.

Everyone assures me that the mustache looks all right. I think they are just being nice, because they can see the haunted look in my eyes. I've got two more months with this thing. I hope I make it.

Oh, and Happy New Year. Did you have a nice holiday? I barely noticed mine.

No Reason Why Not

My interview with David Blixt is finally up over at Metroblogging Chicago. Please swing by there and check it out.

Working on it has emphasized, for me, how little I actually know about journalistic writing. Shame on me, being the son of a journalist and all that.

Special thanks to David for sitting and chatting with me. We should do that again some time — without the recorder, or the guy with the coke-bottle glasses coming over every few minutes to quote Shakespeare at you.

What Have I Got In My Pocket?

Peter Jackson is going to produce The Hobbit. Finally! I hope he directs it as well. And I hope Ian McKellen plays Gandalf again. And of course Andy Serkis has to play Gollum. And my vote for the younger Bilbo would be Martin Freeman of The Office and The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy fame.

According to the article Jackson plans to split the story into two films. I'm cool with that, although I don't know if it's necessary. He managed to squeeze the other volumes into a film each, and those were far more dense than The Hobbit. But one film or two, I'll still line up to see whatever Jackson does when it comes to Middle Earth. I can't wait to see Smaug.

Any thoughts on who should play Bard the Bowman? Or Thorin Oakenshield?

Ministry

I got two tickets to see Ministry for Mandy's birthday. They're playing the House of Blues on May 8th. To be fair, the tickets are a present to myself as much as a present for Mandy. But I think she appreciates them, just the same. At the time that I bought the tickets, the 8th was the final show on the North American leg of the band's farewell tour, but after it sold out they added a second show for the next night. Oh well.

Anyway, I wrote about it in a little more detail over at Metroblogging Chicago. Please stop by there and check it out, along with the other articles and writers who contribute to the site.

Also, coming soon to Metroblogging Chicago, my interview with local author, actor, director, and spoiler of women, David Blixt! Stay tuned!